This weekend I began to seriously question the future of my running. I set out for my first double digit run, very uncertain and dreading the whole experience. However, I set out anyway, knowing I would feel better once I got into the run. Only I didn’t.
I am typically able to get up my usual hill without having to take a walking break. This time I was barely able to get through 2 miles before I had to stop and walk. I would begin running only to have to stop shortly after. I was exhausted and simply did not have the energy to run. My lack of sleep caught up to me. I’m sure getting to bed at 12 the night before didn’t help matters either.
I decided I would allow myself to walk uphill, however, I would run the descents. I was taking a path I hadn’t previously. I mapped it out, however one of the roads I hadn’t been up ended up being a dead end. Thank God for maps on my phone. I was able to find my way through the neighborhood and was soon back on track.
|View from my detour|
Only I wasn’t really. Every time I began to run I would end up stopping shortly after. It was a bit warmer than it has been recently. Mile 6 I began to have a familiar pain in my foot. I am not sure if my shoe is too tight and that is the cause of my pain. I have noticed I only get these pains on my long run. Mile 7 I ran out of water. Mile 8 I began to have stomach cramps. Mile 9 I simply wanted the torture to be over.
The first half of this “run” I was determined to get those 10 miles in even if I had to walk all 10. By mile 9, if someone had offered me a ride home I would have had a difficult time turning them down.
Around 9.5 miles I saw this.
It was horribly depressing. Here I was on the worst run of my life and I was met with a sign for a race I have wanted terribly to do for the past year. It made me feel like a failure. The fact that this race literally runs past my house only emphasized how close yet how far I am from being able to do it, or so I felt that day.
I ended up walking a good majority of this run. So much so that it feels wrong to even call it a run. So many things came together this day to make for one miserable run. There was my complete exhaustion, the heat, the pain, the cramps and the dehydration. This run truly did make me stop and consider if I ever want to run again.
However, I know it was just one day. It was one bad run, albeit it was the worst run I’ve ever had. But I will move on. I will run. I will finish my half. I will also make sure I get plenty of sleep. I believe this is ultimately was caused a difficult run to turn into a miserable. Live and learn. Just gotta keep moving.
What do you do when you are met with obstacles to your plans and goals?